Friday, September 10, 2010


JSH: But does it matter?

I feel a certain responsibility to try and explain how math students are being screwed by the refusal to acknowledge a certain math error, but posters seem to think I personally need the result known, when that's silly. My position as a major discoverer is strengthened by the denial.

Worse, as I know my ideas travel the world, I can get a sense of where that can lead which doesn't require that things move quickly.

But, um, more importantly, I kind of do ok anyway, so it's not like I necessarily need my life turned upside down by fame.

I've had the argument with myself quite a bit, and most of the time I kind of lean towards, ok, I'll do enough as I can see where to go, but thank God for the time to think! The time to plan. The time to watch "celebs" and wonder what to do with the attention.

Fame is not easy. You lose a lot of privacy. You enter a different world.

Once I go through that door, it's not like I can turn around and change my mind!

Worse I don't get celebrity like some movie star, rock star or actor. They quit looking for attention and the world will go away.

With me, the attention will only grow. I won't be able to walk away. Won't be able to say I don't want it.

All these names of famous people that you know, all the celebs of today have an out. I won't.

I think it important that humanity does correct mathematics. But there is a price for me to pay. As I could just wander off and do other things. It IS tempting. Has been tempting for years.

To just walk away now, and let things happen in the fullness of time, like that 2030 date I tossed out a while back. That's kind of like the fantasy. Ok world, how about I take 20 more years, eh? Will it really hurt the human species that much for me to do my own thing, to live a normal life, to be free of fame and attention for 20 more years?

If not, then hey, maybe that can happen! I know that's what I'd like, but then I think about those students whose lives will be thrown away in the process. Dare I sacrifice all those young minds? If it's my choice then, no.

But so far it has been the world's choice, and the world has said they are expendable.

And if the world says they are expendable, then they are.

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