Monday, September 10, 2007
JSH: My math
Today like many other days I looked over what I call my toys, my mathematical discoveries. I counted some primes with my prime counting function, and factored some numbers with my invention, surrogate factoring, and it is always this weird feeling as with mathematics I know how much of this world is about lying.
People lie. So it's about time and history before other people may know what I have discovered or, better yet, admit what I've discovered, but I'm outside of time and can appreciate it now.
I can look over my non-polynomial factorization results and contemplate my proof of Fermat's Last Theorem.
I can read over my definition of mathematical proof, and think about the object ring.
I can contemplate the connection between math and logic, and wonder about where ideas come from, and what it means to seek truth.
At the end of the day, as I'm typing this at the end of a day, I have the knowledge of my humanity and the seeking of knowledge for its own sake, beyond what people say, beyond what it got me because from others it got me headaches, and insults and a lot of people trying to tell me I was wrong.
Knowing the truth does not mean that others know that you know. And maybe the pain of that is just part of understanding what truth is.
It is not about what people believe you know. Proof is not about belief.
What I got, what I have is the knowledge of rightness. The sense of a perfection in reality.
What I got was sitting time with God.
And at the end of the day, sitting as the sole human being in that place is not a negative, but a gut check.
For now, for this time, I am the sole human being in charge of some of the greatest knowledge that humanity has come across to date, and it is my destiny to know.
It was my destiny to know.
And for while that lasts, it's my math.
And in this place while I stand alone at the pinnacle of human knowledge, and I look out at infinity, and see it alone.
I appreciate it that much more.
I stand alone, and I know, and in knowing, with my place far beyond what most people can imagine, I touch infinity, and in knowing that small part that I do, I appreciate that no matter what anyone else thinks.
It is all—brilliant.
People lie. So it's about time and history before other people may know what I have discovered or, better yet, admit what I've discovered, but I'm outside of time and can appreciate it now.
I can look over my non-polynomial factorization results and contemplate my proof of Fermat's Last Theorem.
I can read over my definition of mathematical proof, and think about the object ring.
I can contemplate the connection between math and logic, and wonder about where ideas come from, and what it means to seek truth.
At the end of the day, as I'm typing this at the end of a day, I have the knowledge of my humanity and the seeking of knowledge for its own sake, beyond what people say, beyond what it got me because from others it got me headaches, and insults and a lot of people trying to tell me I was wrong.
Knowing the truth does not mean that others know that you know. And maybe the pain of that is just part of understanding what truth is.
It is not about what people believe you know. Proof is not about belief.
What I got, what I have is the knowledge of rightness. The sense of a perfection in reality.
What I got was sitting time with God.
And at the end of the day, sitting as the sole human being in that place is not a negative, but a gut check.
For now, for this time, I am the sole human being in charge of some of the greatest knowledge that humanity has come across to date, and it is my destiny to know.
It was my destiny to know.
And for while that lasts, it's my math.
And in this place while I stand alone at the pinnacle of human knowledge, and I look out at infinity, and see it alone.
I appreciate it that much more.
I stand alone, and I know, and in knowing, with my place far beyond what most people can imagine, I touch infinity, and in knowing that small part that I do, I appreciate that no matter what anyone else thinks.
It is all—brilliant.
# posted by James Harris @ 00:06 
